By Pastor Andrew Farland
A few years ago, a nurse wrote a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.
She had spent quite a few years working in hospice, and over time she noticed an emerging pattern.
Patient after patient told her some of their deepest regrets. These are the top five:
1. Live up to your own expectations, not those of others.
Trying to please others will wear you out. God makes it clear that you can serve only one master: Christ our Savior. You have His permission to live an honorable life of your choosing.
Whatever you select to do with the days God has given you, do them to the best of your ability. Let go of your worry about what others might think and live up to God’s standards as best as you can.
2. Don’t work so hard that you exclude all else.
If only I worked more hours or took less vacation time, said no one in palliative care ever. In looking back, those who were dying wished they had spent their time on the things that mattered the most.
Your job is only a job. You won’t be able to take it with you.
3. Speak up.
You have every right to your opinions. Your ideas matter. Don’t let others squash them before they see the light of day. In Matthew 5:15, we are reminded that it’s pointless to light a candle and put it under a bushel. Light is meant to reveal and guide the way for others.
Be that light by letting your voice be heard.
4. Remain in contact with friends.
Even with social media platforms like Facebook, it’s easy to lose contact with the friends you make in life. You get busy, things happen, and before you know it, years go by. God reminds us in Proverbs that just as iron sharpens iron, one man sharpens another.
We need our friends.
Staying in touch with your friends is the second-best thing you can do for yourself. Maintaining daily contact with God is the best thing you can do for yourself.
5. Choose happiness.
It’s unlikely that you can control every event in your life, but you can control how you respond to whatever happens to you. Your emotions are your response; no one else picks them out for you.
Choose to be happy.
Happiness comes from trusting in God.
Most importantly, leave regret behind.
It doesn’t matter if you’re young or old; regret will weigh you down like an anchor. It will prevent you from moving forward with your life. You won’t be able to enjoy yourself or those around you. Regret will shrivel relationships, making them wither and pass into nothingness.
Know instead, that like Timothy, you fought the good fight, finished the race and kept the faith:
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” (2 Timothy 4:7)
Leave regret behind.
Proverbs 15:13
“A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is crushed.”
